Tuesday, January 12, 2010

10 Things Trevor Loves About Being a Dad

Good morning.

Trevor signing in.

It's early.

Before 5am.

I'm writing to you now because I can't sleep. I can't sleep because last night Nicole and I had a discussion (code for disagreement) about parenthood and how it consumes our lives and, for the moment, singularly defines us as people. We are no longer Trevor and Nicole...but...Mom and Dad. And because of that, we forget that for 30 years prior to being...Mom and Dad...we were individuals with needs, wants, personalities, dreams, and hopes. Our lives have in many ways become very routine and very focused on raising happy, healthy, and disciplined children and in some cases, what suffers is our relationship with each other.

Well, since that's what has been going through my head all night, and since we sometimes forget to pay attention to each other with everything else going on, I want Nicole to know that my relationship with her is just as important as my relationship with the kids. And at the risk of sounding like a cheap romance novel...I want to remind her here how much she means to me and how important she is in my life. I love you so much, Nicole!

I also need her to know that I love being a parent. Despite the loss of identity, lack of freedom, and postponement of dreams, I wouldn't trade my title of Dad for anything in the world. One of the things I look forward to every day is walking through the garage door and having both kids glad to see me. Sometimes they even open the door and run to my car excited to see me. So, because I write better than I talk, I'll put down here, as a reminder to all of my family, the top 10 things I love about being a Dad:

10. The kids thinking that I know everything in the world about every subject in the world. I feel like the smartest person in the world. But I already knew that. :-)
9. Family activities. Having everyone excited to go somewhere or do something energizes me.
8. Teaching life lessons. Trying to communicate lessons learned over 35 years to a child can be a challenge, but it's so fun when they remember the lesson you taught them and repeat it back to you when you least expect it. ("Never give up, remember Dad?")
7. Bath time. It's a nightly routine and I miss it terribly when I'm gone.
6. Reading to the kids. Especially Dr. Seuss Oh the Places You'll Go.
5. Seeing them learn to read, write, and draw. They want so much to make their mom and dad proud of them and I love that they do.
4. Tickle fights. Seeing them laugh is what I think is the best part.
3. The fact that they want me to play with them all the time. It can be exhausting, but it also helps put things in perspective when I get too wrapped up in work.
2. I already mentioned coming home every night to excited, smiling faces.
1. I know that whatever else happens in my day, that my kids still think that I'm the most important man in their lives.

JJ and Cate...you are two incredible people and I hope I can be who you need me to be for you. I love you both!

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Where to begin...

...maybe with the new year. I have been walking around in a haze the last couple of days. Nothing to get done and nothing to do. I don't know what to do with myself after the craziness of Christmas and my sister's wedding. Just so I remember what has happened since Thanksgiving...I am going to digress.

Went to Maui with the kids and Clint and Christie!!! Had J.J.'s Star Wars Themed party with 19 kids (WHAT WAS I THINKING)...Best part, the Darth Vador Pinata. My birthday was uneventful this year and that was perfectly fine with me. Up to Idaho for Christmas and 8 days of getting everything ready for my sister's wedding. Sister's wedding on the 30th (I was the photographer). I think everything turned out great except for me trying to get used to my new flash. Drive home...new years eve was at home. I think I was asleep before the ball even dropped. The last week we have all been sick with the cold and flu. I think we are all starting to feel better. So, I am now ready to start the new year.

Here is what we sent home with the kids for a thank you. (of course with their own picture).


Mike and Saundra...aren't they adorable?

I looked over my New Year Resolutions from last year, and I accomplished all of them except one (lose weight). Why is this always the bane of my existence? So this year, it isn't even going to be a resolution. Of course I am still going to be healthy and try, but I am NOT making it a resolution. This year, only one resolution. Find Joy in everyday, no matter how crazy. So, since i am behind, I have a few for today...

1. old school Sarah Mclaughlin. It reminds me of making out with my husband in college. JOY!
2. Cate saying "cupcake". It is adorable. i always ask her to say it because it is so cute.
3. How do you find joy in sick kids...I think the joy is that they will cuddle with you. Cate does not like to snuggle and so that is the joy...she will snuggle with me.
4. instead of getting irritated that my husband doesn't replace the trash bag when he takes the trash out, I am going to be happy that I have a husband that will take the trash out. Thank you honey!
5. I am even going to be joyful about the cold weather...How? hmmm...I am joyful because I can stay inside and finish a really good book in less than 24 hours. There, I did it.
6. J.J. learning to spell. Whenever he wants me, he says M-O-M. It makes me smile. I am not going to be sad that he is growing up so fast. Well, maybe a little.

More tomorrow.